Calm down, take a deep breath, and go back to the basics. You’d be surprised how many solutions you can find to your frustrations, problems, and questions if you simply look back to the basics and see how they apply. Everything you do is refinement of the fundamentals, there are few tricks and secrets, the truth lies within your ability to perform the basics at an advanced level.
At some point, when thoughts are no longer needed for a punch or a kick, amid the effort and repetition the body releases more than simple kinetic energy with each movement. Ill will and feelings, anxieties, fears, desires, sadness are expelled; chipping away at the inner self little by little until there is nothing left. That nothingness --that emptiness --that void is to be sought. At that moment the martial artist can have a clear perception of life itself without perversion. Brief as it may be until feelings and ego return, the glimpses of clarity allow the martial artist to grow and understand the workings of world.